Fear Strikes

So I'm just about to pump half a gallon of caffeine into my body before attempting the UBS online numerical test. I don't know why I feel so jittery about doing it, perhaps it's because I've convinced myself that there is so much at stake and that i need to get this in order to 'push the button' for a concrete slab to fall in front of me that allows me to progress to the next stage.

But it has to be done. I can't not do it, how ridiculous would that be? I'm going to just sit here and let 'Anthems for a Seventeen Year Old Girl' carry away any doubts i hold inside myself.

It's about time i believed and replace those ethereal cobwebs with a quiet confidence.

Ahh. So is life. Reading week begins this Friday and all I can think of is how closer and closer exams in May are coming...the preparation beckons indeed. Nonetheless, I'm hoping to just sit down and get on with it. My time at Swarthmore College imbued me with so much hope for the future, so much motivation and a desire to live...not to solely exist. 

I can't wait to see my special girl again for her graduation, it inspires me to work so hard so as to allow me to feel as if i deserve to be there, that i deserve to share in such a momentous occasion. I miss her so much!!!

And I'm sure everyone, who are frankly more than aware of how attached i am to Hillary, will appreciate the fact that i'm half way through her biography and that means I am just 250 pages away from starting Barack Obama's autobiography. I'm looking forwards to reading it. I just don't understand why everyone assumes i hate him. I don't! I just have a preference, that's all!